Brigita's Blog: Are You Communicating What You Really Mean?

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Are You Communicating What You Really Mean?

 

Are You Communicating What You Really Mean?

 

                                             Are You Communicating Exactly What You Mean?

 

I have been training my Off-the-Track-Thoroughbred mare, Pippa, for a while now.  Training had been going well to a point where we were no longer progressing.  No matter how hard I tried and what method I used, we were at a standstill in the training progress.  I couldn't figure things out.  Maybe I was missing something.  After all, I have trained green horses before.

 

I decided to ask a local trainer to help me.  She was more than happy to come up.  

 

At our first session, she watched me work with Pippa.  Within a few minutes, if even that long, she knew what the problem was.  It was me.  I was not communicating with her so she could understand what I was asking of her.  It turned out that I was giving her mixed signals, which totally confused her.  The trainer continued by explaining that my verbal requests did not reflect what my body was saying.  

 

You see, horses communicate with body language and feel, and are very sensitive to it.  Verbal requests mean nothing.  It is like speaking to someone who does not speak English.  They will not understand the words, but will try to read your body language to figure out what you are trying to communicate.

 

Once I corrected my body language, I saw a huge difference in Pippa.  She was responding to exactly what I wanted her to do.  It wasn't perfect, but it was happening.  What a difference!

 

The same is true in our real estate businesses, or any business for that matter, when we work with consumers and clients.  Our words may be saying one thing, but our overall message delivered by our body language is completely different.  Our words may be saying "I am confident" while at the same time our body is slouched stating "No, I am not confident".  Or, how about communicating to the other party, "I am focused on what you are saying", when in reality, they can see your body is saying, "I have other things on my mind".

 

When we communicate with others, be it humans or animals, we must always be aware of whether or not our words match what our bodies are saying.  Believe it or not, your body sends a stronger message than your words.

 

 

 

Brigita McKelvie is a REALTOR®  (Pennsylvania License #RS297130) with Cindy Stys Equestrian & Country Properties, specializing in rural and horse properties and farms in Eastern Pennsylvania.  She has an e-Pro® (Certified Internet Expert) certification and a GRI (Graduate, REALTOR® Institute) designation.  

Brigita McKelvie, REALTOR

Pennsylvania License #RS297130

Rural and Horse Properties and Farms

 

Cindy Stys Equestrian & Country Properties, Ltd.Cindy Stys Equestrian & Country Properties, Ltd.

 

The Premier Equine and Country Real Estate firm serving Eastern Pennsylvania from back yard operations to world class equestrian facilities.

Use a REALTOR with "horse sense" that doesn't horse around when it comes to horse properties.

 

 

e-ProGRI (Graduate, REALTOR Institute)BNI

 

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Comment balloon 14 commentsBrigita McKelvie, Associate Broker • January 04 2017 02:30PM

Comments

Good Morning Brigita McKelvie, Associate Broker 

I've heard it said that around 80% of communication is non-verbal. 

Posted by Doug Dawes, Your Personal Realtor® (Keller Williams Realty - Topsfield, MA) 9 months ago

It is always important to keep in mind how we come across

Posted by Kristin Johnston - REALTOR®, Giving Back With Each Home Sold! (RE/MAX Realty Center ) 9 months ago

Hi, Doug!

I have heard the same.

Brigita

Posted by Brigita McKelvie, Associate Broker, The Broker with horse sense and no horsing around (Cindy Stys Equestrian and Country Properties, Ltd.) 9 months ago

Absolutely, Kristin!

Brigita

Posted by Brigita McKelvie, Associate Broker, The Broker with horse sense and no horsing around (Cindy Stys Equestrian and Country Properties, Ltd.) 9 months ago

This is a great story to share. All of us need to be careful with our body language.

Posted by Roy Kelley, Roy and Dolores Kelley Photographs (Realty Group Referrals) 9 months ago

Good morning, Roy!

Absolutely!  I still have to be aware of my body, although I am getting better at it.

Brigita

Posted by Brigita McKelvie, Associate Broker, The Broker with horse sense and no horsing around (Cindy Stys Equestrian and Country Properties, Ltd.) 9 months ago

Hi Brigita.  There's a great lesson to learn from this for us all.

Posted by Gabe Sanders, Stuart Florida Real Estate (Real Estate of Florida specializing in Martin County Residential Homes, Condos and Land Sales) 9 months ago

Good morning, Gabe!

Most definitely!  Animals teach us so much.

Brigita

Posted by Brigita McKelvie, Associate Broker, The Broker with horse sense and no horsing around (Cindy Stys Equestrian and Country Properties, Ltd.) 9 months ago

Hi Brigita - I bookmarked this because it is a great illustration of how we have to watch our non verbal communication.

Posted by Grant Schneider, Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes (Performance Development Strategies) 9 months ago

Good morning, Grant!

Glad you liked the post.  Sometimes illustrations are a good way to get the message through.

Brigita

 

Posted by Brigita McKelvie, Associate Broker, The Broker with horse sense and no horsing around (Cindy Stys Equestrian and Country Properties, Ltd.) 9 months ago

Great message, Brigita!  How we present ourselves and our carriage often say more than our words ever will.  My daughter had a giant pet Quarterhorse for 6 years.  It was fun to watch their wordless communication and the beauty of their seamless movement.

Posted by Beth Bromund, REALTOR (248) 651-3500 (Coldwell Banker Weir Manuel) 8 months ago

Good morning, Beth!

It is great to see some of the wonderful relationships humans and horses have.  When we were searching for a horse for my son years ago, we found a Thoroughbred that he tried out.  All he did was sit on him and ne knew this was the horses, without even riding.  The connection was felt between them.  This is why they also did so well together in competitions.  They even made it to National competition two years in a row.  

Brigita

Posted by Brigita McKelvie, Associate Broker, The Broker with horse sense and no horsing around (Cindy Stys Equestrian and Country Properties, Ltd.) 8 months ago

Came here via Roy's reblog.  Great post and insight! -Kasey

Posted by Kasey & John Boles, Boise & Meridian, ID Ada/Canyon/Gem/Boise Counties (Jon Gosche Real Estate, LLC - BoiseMeridianRealEstate.com) 8 months ago

Thank you, Kasey!

Brigita

Posted by Brigita McKelvie, Associate Broker, The Broker with horse sense and no horsing around (Cindy Stys Equestrian and Country Properties, Ltd.) 8 months ago

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