For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on:
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: 'If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.'
In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part):
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash.........
Twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single 'This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation' warning light.
I love the next one !!!
7. The airbag system would ask 'Are you sure?' before deploying.
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. Every time a new car was introduced, car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
10. You'd have to press the 'Start' button to turn the engine off
PS - I'd like to add that when all else fails, you could call 'customer service' in some foreign country and be instructed in some foreign language how to fix your car yourself !!!!
Please share this with your friends who love - but sometimes hate - their computer!
This is so priceless. Thanks fo allowing us to share this because I am thanks again love it love it love it . The reason, because so much of it is true
Charlie:
It certainly is soooooo true!
Brigita
Brigita-GM guy writes good jokes. If they built cars as good as his or her jokes, they'd not likely be facing bankruptcy. Good jokes though.
Thats sooo true! Good jokes thanks for the laugh!
Excellent humor very funny, Wish the vehicles were as good as the jokes are! Horses are probably more reliable and much less expensive in the long run!
Wayne:
Good point!
Brigita
Team Honeycutt:
Glad you enjoyed it!
Brigita
Hillarious! I loved the one about stopping alongside the road and re-booting...so true...
Caron:
I have to agree with you on that one. Right now my vehicle is breaking down so often and eating up my money more than my horse.
Brigita
Tristan:
That is a good one!
Brigita
Brigita,
Along the lines of #5 you could throw in: You turn onto some roads and your car would freeze saying "This road is incapatable with your current version of GM".
Bob
This is hysterical, yet so true. They should have also put in something about ONSTAR calling while in mid travel to let the driver know that there are new service manuals or updates to the driver's manual.
'll have to reblog this on my site, Thanks
Brigita, So true. I do have a MAC and there are some PC apps that do not play well with MAC...
Your building consultant for life in Nashville, TN
Brigita, thanks for the chuckle this morning ! I needed it and can always count on you! TGIF!
Brigita....every time I read this I still laugh ..thanks for sharing it....peace zane
Very funny, thanks for sharing. Unfortunately, my computer is more relaible than my car!
This is too much! I could almost picture someone tryng to lift the car handle, turn the key, and reach the radio antennae at the same time!
Kathy
Bob:
That's a good one! :-)
Brigita
Ed:
I like that one!
Brigita
Michael:
We need to look at the frustrations on the humorous side to help cope with it.
Brigita
Kristin:
Glad you got a laugh out of it! Hope you had a great weekend!
Brigita
Zane:
I do too! :-)
Brigita
Cheryl:
My computer and car are running neck and neck. They seem to alternate.
Brigita
Kathy:
That would be an interesting sight to see.
Brigita
Hysterical Brigita!
This comparison makes a strong case for buying a Mac!!!
Craig:
I have to agree with you on that!
Brigita